Lately, there’s been a lot of talking about gay marriage. It’s a subject that always draws out strong opinions, despite the fact that it is not anyone’s business what goes on in other people’s bedrooms, so to speak.
If two adult persons want to be together – sexually, or not – why should anyone decide for them that they cannot be together? It doesn’t harm anyone, it doesn’t violate any law, yet some people cannot stand the idea that gay people actually have feelings.
I used to be totally anti-marriage, and I had stronger reasons than my parents’ divorce. Most people around misunderstood my point of view because they were so drenched in common beliefs on the topic that they couldn’t slip out of that thinking pattern for a minute and listen to my simple logic. I simply didn’t see the necessity of a marriage contract – I could and I did “tie the knot” without one and my relationship felt complete even without socioreligious consent.
I decided to get married only because it matters to others… and it’s not such a great compromise, after all. I still don’t see the necessity, but my practical sense doesn’t resist good logic – legally and socially, marriage changes a lot of iffy situations. People get married simply because it is considered a normal step in a relationship, the mark of supreme seriousness and commitment, but… I still think it’s all a (usually) sugar-coated “that’s the right thing to do”, “everybody does it”, “that’s the way it should be” kind of thing.
Yes, I still believe marriage in itself is essentially useless… because it doesn’t influence my level of commitment or love. Why do I need vows, or a contract to state that we’re a family, when I’ve been a wife to my soul-mate for years before marriage? Why do I need formal packaging to get the social respect I deserve for being devoted to my home? But it’s not a question of reason… it’s simply convention.
Why should gay people be denied the right to get married? Maybe because some people really love their homophobia and hate. But, straight people, gay people, bisexual people, asexual people have something in common – they’re all people! People with brains and feelings. People who want a family and a home. People who have suffered and loved.
Do you honestly think there’s enough love in the world today? And I don’t refer to love in couples (straight or gay), but love for our fellow humans. The kind of love that can save a teenager confused about his/her sexuality from becoming depressive or even committing suicide. The kind of love that recognizes that gay people who want to get married are not promiscuous. The kind of love that makes one say: “I don’t understand you, you’re unusual for me, I don’t know if I will ever be able to understand, but I’m going to treat you the way I would like to be treated myself.”
Straight or gay, a happy person is more valuable to society than a depressed/angry one. For some, happiness means marrying the one they love.
“Love and marriage go together like a horse and carriage”?! This I tell you, brother: you CAN have one without the other, but when they do go together, we all should give our help, not create obstacles.